Marriage Empowerment Tips for Managing Your Marriage During the Pandemic
Marriages require an effective balance of separateness and togetherness. The proper ratio varies from couple to couple. Too much time together can be as challenging as not enough.
Consider these tips to avoid allowing the pandemic to disrupt your marriage:
#1. If you have activities done together for months now also consider doing activities separately.
For sure it has been 9 months that you’re spending plenty of time together. Before COVID life, you might have struggled to find time to spend with your spouse. By this time you have too much of a good thing, especially if you have a smaller home. Spend some time apart each day.
This is simple to accomplish. One of you goes to the store while the other one stays home. When the shopper returns, the person that stayed home can go for a walk. There’s a couple of hours of peace right there.
#2. It’s best to stay busy. Idle minds have a tendency to become agitated. As old couples would say an idle mind is the devil’s playground.
Find something to do and put your attention on the task. It is more productive and enjoyable way to coexist.
#3. Establish routines.
As a couple we have what we call our S.A.V.E.R.S morning routine we learned from a guru. This takes 6 minutes, just give 1 minute for each activity. Once you make this a habit you will notice that you are giving more time for this routine.
S for silence. Do your individual morning prayer and scripture reading.
A for affirmation. Reading several times a marriage empowerment and self affirmation reflection.
Let me share this affirmation prayer from Bro. Bo Sanchez:
“Today I receive all of God’s love for me. Today I open myself to the unbounded, limitless, overflowing abundance of God’s universe. Today I open myself to God’s healing and miracles. Today I open myself to God’s Word so that I become like Jesus every day. Today I proclaim that I’m God’s beloved, I’m God’s servant, I’m God’s powerful champion. And because I am blessed I’m blessing the world in Jesus’ Name. Amen.”
V for visualization. Visualizing how the day will go is so refreshing and keeps you in focus on the day’s work.
E for exercise. Moving your body early morning gives you enough energy to get you on the move for the day.
R for reading. Though reading the scripture has been done in the S time, add reading 5-10 pages of an article or book of your choice.
S for scribble. Write what you have in mind, what you are grateful of, what are your day’s goal and more this will clarify your day’s intentions.
#4. Communicate. Communication is always important. It’s more important now than ever. Try to have at least one meaningful conversation each day.
What makes a conversation meaningful? Both of you are glad you had the conversation. You can have a meaningful conversation about the weather or garbage cans, as long as you’re both glad you had the conversation afterwards.
#5. Now is not the time for passive-aggressive behavior. As much as possible avoid doing things that you know can irritate your spouse.
Now that most of the time your spouse is staying home make the best of it. You might be doing things that irritate your partner on purpose to spite him or her. What for? Increasing the level of resentment is just foolish.
#6. Put a stop to any criticism, contempt, defensiveness or stonewalling. These are the four horsemen in marriage that definitely will put your relationship in jeopardy.
Yes, there are times that you might be frustrated with each other, but why take it to another level when it is not necessary? Have you ever received any personal criticism or contempt that strengthened your relationship with that person? Doubtful.
#7. Lessen stress by keeping the house tidy. Encourage everyone to keep the house clean by assigning chores to do each day. Cleanliness is next to Godliness and a tidy home home is a more peaceful home.
Marriages are challenging even under great circumstances, and we’re not living in great circumstances right now. A little prevention can go a long way toward preserving your marriage.
Be sure to give each other the alone time that you both need. Place a premium on communication. Be kind. This is good advice for any marriage under any circumstance, and even more so during troubling times.